“Who taught you to hate your own kind?” – Relationships in a country where it is considered “natural” to love whites.

“Who taught you to hate the texture of your hair? Who taught you to hate the color of your skin to the point that you bleach to get like the white man? Who taught you to hate the shape of your nose and lips? Who taught you hate yourself from the top of your head to the soles of your feet? Who taught you to hate your own kind? Who taught you to hate the race that you belong to so much so that you don’t want to be around each other?” Malcolm X – photo: Singer Preta Gil and fiancee (left), actor Marcello Melo and girlfriend

Note from BW of Brazil: It’s a topic we’ve dealt with in a number of posts on the blog. And it’s a topic that is reverberating in numerous sites, blogs and pages of black Brazilian militants and groups. And as we’ve pointed out, people don’t date and marry each simply based on love and there are numerous studies out there that show this to be true. People don’t choose their partners based only on beauty and not only on personality. There are numerous other attributes that go into these choices and as such, one only falls in love after they have intricately considered how their potential partner measures up in these categories. But increasingly people are noticing (and many have noticed for a number of years) that among Afro-Brazilians, both males and females, sometimes it seems that many prefer to enter these types of relationships with a member of any group with the exception of their own. Maybe race and color have nothing to do with their choices. It is possible. But it would also be foolish to believe that other psychological factors (often times in the subconscious) don’t weigh into these choices especially in a Brazil in which elites openly admitted of the desire to whiten the country through the promotion of whiteness and interracial unions which would eventually lead to the elimination of the black race. Now 40-50 years ago, social scientists would have had us believe that the thoughts of black American leaders such as Malcolm X had no place in a nation such as Brazil where such racial conflict supposedly didn’t exist. But over the years since the sound rejection of Brazil’s fabled “racial democracy” myth, thousands of black Brazilians are finding that the words of the iconic 1960s leader apply to Brazil’s black population in a more ways than most Brazilians would acknowledge.  

Who taught you to hate your own kind?

Courtesy of the Auto Defesa Negra page

Love should be free, but here among us… what freedom have we black people had to love and be loved? We were taught that what’s “natural” is to love white. We see black women and black men that only have relationships with whites and society thinks it’s “natural” because love “não tem cor” (has no color).

Preta Gil and boyfriend Rodrigo Godoy
Preta Gil and boyfriend Rodrigo Godoy

When we say that we must learn to value black men and black women, they say we are “forcing” it, they say that we are going against something “natural”. In fact, we have never been free to love black men and black women and equally we have never been free to be loved. However, the advancement of racial consciousness inevitably teaches us to value black beauty and develop for black men and black women all the affection eclipsed due to the white poison that we are given together with their Eurocentric values. Thus, the relationships that a black person maintains are symptoms of how their racial consciousness goes. The love of Europóide and the urge to attack other blacks are part of the self hatred that the white system teaches our people. This self hatred materializes in disgust for our equals and eternal attempt to integrate the whites, including in relationships.

In February, actor Marcello Melo provoked outrage among black female fans after his disparaging comments about a black woman
In February, actor Marcello Melo provoked outrage among black female fans after his disparaging comments about a black woman

From this point of view it’s not surprising the fact that Globo TV actor Marcello Melo Jr. has shared a photo of a black woman with almost no hair in the front ridiculing her “hairstyle” helping to disparage the image of black women. An attack on black women represents an attack on all the black people of which this Globo actor seems to equally want to disconnect himself from in order to try to integrate more and more into the white world. That’s what your interracial relationship says. Also not surprising is the fact that Preta Gil being marked for marriage with a white man and saying that she wishes to marry in the church where the “princess” Isabel was baptized because, in the words of Preta Gil herself, “If it weren’t for the Princess Isabel, I would be married in the senzala (slave quarters).” This is a manifestation of love so blind to the white symbol that, using her prominent position in the media erases all black men and women’s struggles that imposed the end of slavery thus shaking the pillars of the old regime in Brazil. But for Preta Gil “Isabelzinha gave freedom to people.” Also not surprising is the fact that some interracial of the movement, a day before the Globo actor had ridiculed a black woman, had exposed on the internet statements that legitimize the genocide of black men with phrases implying that blacks are killing themselves and that branquitude (whiteness) has nothing to do with it.

All these manifestations of hatred of blacks and love to Europóides are very regrettable. They are stimulated by whiteness and feed a fight between blacks to the delight of that whiteness. This however, is not new. After all, from the most ancient times, we know we cannot count on everyone and there are a few who like to “straddling the fence” waiting for a chance to be accepted over there. Racial awareness of some of our people still need to move forward and have a willingness to embrace and help those who want to get rid of the white poisons. However, there are those people for which there is no possibility of being on our side. Malês Type: NOT EVERYONE THAT IS WE ARE WITH US (who is to understand, understand)! Fortunately, there are few.

Also reject the three attitudes that occurred virtually all in the same week and they all inter racially black people. All this reinforces our understanding that love the white and hatred of blacks is serious symptom that we have safeguards in relation to those who practice it. Marcelo Mello is not our partner, Preta Gil is not our partner and those who defend the Black Genocide are not.

Not everyone who practices interracial relationship is black house. Some people are simply blind and can still move. However, some are capable of much terrible attitudes. Of those people, Malcolm X once said (1):

“It’s necessary to understand that, historically there were two kinds of slaves: the house negro and the field negro. The house negro lived with the master, in the slave quarters or in the attic of the big house. He dressed, he ate well and he loved his master. He loved his master more than the master loved himself. If the master said: – “We got a good house here” the house negro would say, “yeah, we got a good house here”. If the master’s house caught on fire, the house negro rushed to put out the fire. If the master got sick, the house negro would say, “what’s the matter boss, we sick?” If a field negro came to him and said ‘let’s run away, let’s escape’, he answered: – Where is something better than what we have here? I’m not going anywhere. That was the house negro. In those days he was called a house nigger. And that’s what we call him today, because we’ve got some house niggers running around here.”

Source: Auto defesa Negra page


1. Over the years, numerous Malcolm X quotes have been translated into the Portuguese among Afro-Brazilian activists. Here is the text as it was translated into Portuguese:

“É necessário saber que, historicamente, havia duas espécies de escravos: o negro da casa e o negro do campo. O negro da casa vivia junto do senhor, na senzala ou no sótão da casa grande. Vestia-se, comia bem e amava o senhor. Amava mais o senhor do que o senhor amava a ele. Se o senhor dizia: — Temos uma bela casa. Ele respondia: — Pois temos. Se a casa pegasse fogo, o negro da casa corria para apagar o fogo. Se o senhor adoecesse dizia: — estamos doentes. Se um escravo do campo lhe dissesse ‘vamos fugir desse senhor’, ele respondia: — Existe uma coisa melhor do que o que temos aqui? Não saio daqui. O chamávamos de negro da casa. É o que lhe chamamos agora, porque ainda há muitos negros de casa.”

About Marques Travae 3747 Articles
Marques Travae. For more on the creator and editor of BLACK WOMEN OF BRAZIL, see the interview here.


  1. Who exactly is teaching self-hate? When Blacks don’t own major influencing media outlets, they immediately complain there’s a Gestapo out to squash any elevation of Black Empowerment.

    Is this really true? I mean true in the sense that 90% of European decent people in Latin America and North America are preoccupied with defeating Black Empowerment?

    The answer has to be No!

    In the halls of influence it only takes a minority opinion to change laws, images in books/magazines and other forms of media. Brazil has no problem trumpeting Black women being the face of Carnival or Black men it’s best Football Players. The problem I see is the lack of Blacks actively pursuing to become part of the inter-workings of the elite machine.

    Famous people are too close to power to be any influence. This blog often jumps on Pele’s case for not being more outspoken. Do you realize if he did become outspoken that Blacks in Brazil are unable to pick up the economic slack that would be lost for being vocal about the issues that impact Blacks especially but all poor people in Brazil?

    Black people have this irritating pension for telling others what do with their platforms of influence. Blacks (especially Black women) allow Bill Cosby to be attacked because Black women are direct beneficiaries of Neo-Feminism or Feminism 2.0 He has lost endorsements because of trumped up date rape charges. Are Blacks in America in a position to help him recoup his lost wages? If Bill Cosby was to star in a movie would Blacks support it? Micheal Jackson went to Black people when he needed the support over his allegations of misconduct with children. But as I just said, they (Blacks) are unprepared to support famous Blacks maintain the lifestyle the have built for themselves. So Micheal went to the Middle East and other parts of the world that aren’t as jaded about the pop star as North Americans tended to be.

    In a broader discussion of the lack of support for Black issues world-wide this is very serious issue. Blacks do not have the capital to buy influence in the media or if they did they are reluctant to pool resources and do it. Then we have language barriers not helped by most Blacks suffering from poverty.

    Before any talk of challenge the default power of influence and banking, we need to clean up the mess of Slavery and Exclusion before taking the powerful media and financial establishment that controls everything you see/hear.

    • Whites have no power over us in the real sense, but, The Machine of deceit is not an illusion. Understand that Entertainment and Media are the pathways by which they influence the masses. We see it as fun.and games, they view it as mental conditioning. Hollywood is no different..They push the IR agenda hard, especially the black female/white male context. You bring up Michael Jackson and Bill Cosby…Bad Examples! Both are self-loathing blackmen. Why would proud blackwomen support either of them? Of course, Michael Jackson is dead and gone. Selling Out is not worth it in the end. Other folk don’t respect that in us, they know our greatness…Not a Mystery! We have no reason to hate blackness, this is the fundamental point our people in the Diaspora must realize. Otherwise, we’re just objects of pleasure for others…Unacceptable!

  2. A question for BWB: but why do you think WHITES do it? In a place obsessed with whiteness, full of racists, why would a white person go to the trouble of having a light-skinned black child? In the cases you showed, desire for fame could be one thing, but these are only examples. Also, I’ve seen light skinned blacks + white couples in Brazil even from the same social class. At least in some cases, a more basic sexual attraction could be the case. I consent that these relations are sometime fetishistic, but it happens for both black men and white women. I’m not saying the point of your article is wrong. I actually agree from the dynamic of how black people think/are brainwashed. But in the end, when you take into account whites, it’s sort of puzzling…

    • I agree these cover most cases, but not all. To be clear, I don’t even think finding a partner has much to do with “love”. Most of the time is more similar to a business decision and “love” comes later.

      But some cases are a bit puzzling. I give you one example. I know a Brazilian couple, a light-skinned black and a white (European white, not “Brazilian white”) woman. They met in their early twenties, both are attractive, and their families were both middle class, with not significant differences. They met, started dating and had beautiful children.

      Both could easily have found other partners, both had several other people interested. In her case, tons of white candidates.

      Both their families were in the beginning against the marriage. His family feared she would end up calling him “a nigger” in a discussion (never happened) and her family feared he was a “malandro” (blatant racism, since he was already an engineer!).

      I am not saying the bulk is not probably what you showed in your statistics, but some cases do not seem to fall so simply, at least not for whites.

      In his case, it is easy to see her being white was something extremely valuable, I know for a fact he wanted to have lighter children. But not for her. She was also college educated and had all going for her. The only thing that was “in” for her, was him and she was definitely not a racist person. I would say she was even race naive (as only a few whites can afford to be).

  3. Who taught you to hate the texture of your hair? Who taught you to hate the color of your skin to the point that you bleach to get like the white man? Who taught you to hate the shape of your nose and lips? Who taught you hate yourself from the top of your head to the soles of your feet? Who taught you to hate your own kind? Who taught you to hate the race that you belong to so much so that you don’t want to be around each other?”
    Malcolm said it best! There’s nothing I can add to that!

    • The infrastructure that pushes (Racial Utopianism) is far and wide. It doesn’t fall out of the sky. Some years ago, I made a conscious effort to limit my intake of media via tv, magazines, newspapers, sports, music. The plug has to be pulled from the outlet at some point. Again, this is mental conditioning at its worst. And, they’re very specific in who they target..Blackmen are encouraged to pursue other women and leave blackwomen in the dust. This infuriates me to the max. So casual about it they are, pushing their daughters on blackmen as a wedge. No, I will not cosign this conduct to curry favor. We can’t afford this mindset Kushite. Folk can say that it’s a personal decision, but, the well-being of black people trumps that…Bottomline!

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